And my mom to. I wonder about her trust and the rest of my families state created trust. What exactly happened to it and who's got it.

The NAME, everyone fears the name when used/written when we don't like it, why does it matter how it's capitalized or not?

It's just a part of identification along with other things associated with it.

People who create trusts don't they use their last name?

Declaration of Trust

Is it Tammy Trustmaker, called the grantor or is it called Tammy, called the grantor?

As long as Trustmaker is spelled correctly I am good with it, its identifiable to establish the identity of, to ascertain the origin, nature etc.

What I am still looking for is the proof of the relationship of the trust. I want to see it in Constitutions, Statutes, and Legislative Information - By State in writing.

State Statutes by Topic. http://www.law.cornell.edu/statutes.html#state